Confidence and learning to say NO.

Now, I'm not expecting all of you to be quivering balls of fear but I thought I would tell you how I overcame my lack of confidence around horses. So I guess we will start with how I started to lose it. So at riding school I was quite confident, there was a wee Shetland x who was the best little boy ever, quite cheeky on cutting corners but really fun and good, then I moved on to a bigger pony around 14hh and was still okay but really disliked jumping, I would cry when the instructor put it up too high. Then I went on a medium sized cob, around 14.3hh, and I started to lose my confidence, he would buck when you whipped him, so I spent lesson after lesson hoping I wouldn't be asked to use my stick on him. I had Mel when I was on the 14hh and the cob and I was quite confident but I lost all my confidence with jumping, catching and loading. JUST COULDN'T CUT IT! Melody used to rear at you when you tried to get her in the trailer and catch her, and when I was only 10, that's a scary sight. I would genuinely get my sister or dad to load her. Then after a while I realized I just needed to act confident and stand tall and she would know I meant business.

Melody was then retired and I was stuck with a 14.2hh Connemara x who was my sisters pony. I tried with her but she would stop on hacks at 10 minutes at a time and would bolt home, I ended up never wanting to ride because something might go wrong. After a while trying and her smashing me in the face with her frequent head banging tantrums I had to say to her owner that we were not right for each other and she should go to a PC home where she can be the PC pony she always was. After around 6 months I was pining so much for a horse my parents thought it was time to buy me one :D. So in a matter of time we had blue.

Now, Blue, was such a confidence giver! I'm not sure how as some people ride him and don't see it but it worked for me. By the time I got Blue I was soo nervous around horses I would let them do anything, I was basically trying to cater to the horse, not have a relationship. Day by day I would ride Blue in the field and learn about him and learn how to predict what he would do. He was a wide, hairy highland with the slowest pace ever, perfecto. A couple weeks after getting him I was faced with a challenge, he wanted to go out the arena (forgot to close gate) and I didn't so for the first time in a while I went NO and forced him to walk past the gate several times without the hint of him trying to go through it, this took literally around 40 mins as I have a 3 times rule, you need to do it three times in a row well, before moving on. When I got Blue I began to get my confidence back with all horses, the old neighbors horses I would really get to grips with and tell them off when it was feeding time.

So, I have gone from a quivering child to a confident adult with horses. I obviously can't make you all not have fears but I think the best thing is actually do the thing you don't want to do and stand tall about it. Since Blue is a bit like the cob, (he would buck when whipped) I now just immediately give him a flick with the stick when I need to. This means he realizes that I mean business and I also know how his bucks don't do much, they don't even unseat me. I think it genuinely is best as it really gives you the idea of what will happen and takes away the fear of the unknown. Obviously if your horse really misbehaves and a certain thing just sets them off and you/them could get hurt, don't induce that and make sure that you sort it in a different way. When you have confidence, make sure you are firm with your horse, make sure that any flaws they learn to overcome, whether its bucking, head throwing, rearing, lack of manners or biting.  Now, only a tiny portion of that was actual advice, but if you want some more just email me at bluehoofprints@gmail.com. Have a good day x